A Day In The Life Of The Mugiwara Family

Today was the big day. He planned for this for at least a entire month. Packed a backpack and everything.  Armed with two sets of clean clothes, and about five days of stolen meat from the fridge, Luffy was ready to set forth and explore the wide world in search of obtaining his dream: becoming a great pirate.

“Bye, Mom!” He shouted as he hopped down the front porch’s staircase and landed on the red brick road leading to the street. “I’m leaving forever to become a pirate!”

Robin Mugiwara waved her son from the porch, balancing herself against a support beam. ”Alright, have fun!” She shouted. “Be back by dinner!”

“Don’t worry, I will!” Luffy promised as he waved behind him as he took a right towards the docks. Robin shook her head as she watched one of her sons skip away without a care in the world on this sunny Saturday morning. She knew there was nothing in the world that could harm a hair on her poor boy’s head and went to get the early morning mail. She shuffled through the letters, seeing the expected bills, ads, spam…and a letter from Harvard? That alone made her forget the all-important water bill and made her open the letter and quickly read the contents.

Interesting.

She made a beeline back inside and towards the kitchen, following the sound of her elder sons arguing once more. Sanji really wanted Zoro to move away from the fridge so he could grab the next ingredients for his usual five-star breakfast. Sanji held his bowl with one hand and pushed forward with another, but the more bulkier Zoro just stood there sipping on one of the hundred sodas in the house. The only other person in the kitchen was Chopper, humming some tune he overheard his dad playing the other day while sitting down at the table and waiting for his meal. Nami must be waiting for Sanji to deliver her food to her room and Brook must be off in the attic looking for whatever the hell he suddenly remembered existed. Robin already knew Franky had already grabbed his breakfast several hours ago and was most likely downing his third cola while working on the SUPER car alongside his usual partner Usopp.

Having been around that man for over twenty years, Robin had a hard time saying or even thinking the word SUPER without saying it like how he would.

“Chopper?” She spoke up, earning the youngest immediate attention.

“Yes mommy?” Chopper immediately replied. Robin went around him and faced him from across the table.

“Chopper…” Robin then sighed right before placing the letter on the table over to him. “We received this acceptance letter from Harvard Medical School…” The moment those words left her mouth did the youngest in the family shift his eyes and head down and he started to kick his legs back and forth under the table. “…did you apply?”

Chopper sighed. “Umm…” A visible blush came over his entire face. “…maybe?”

Robin sighed, but smiled. “Tony, dear, you’re only eight.”

“But I passed.” Chopper moved his head and put on a big smile. “I’m a medical genius, so I would fit in in the one of the best colleges around!” At this point, Sanji had managed to retrieve whatever he needed from the fridge and started to sing a love song that he just made up. This made Zoro get the hell out of the kitchen, making Robin wonder why Sanji didn’t just do that in the first place.

“Chopper…” Robin thought of a good way of explaining this to such a young person. “We can’t afford it…” But to prevent Chopper from becoming crest-fallen, she followed up with, “But if you’re serious about going to Harvard, then let’s get you ready for it.” Chopper’s head went up and his eyes started to sparkle. “We can afford for you to work alongside the Drum Doctors once they return to town. They should teach you everything and more, and if you work real hard, they might even pay your way into the college!”

Chopper’s eyes went so bright you can swear he could fire actual laser beams out of it. Robin handed him the letter and he took and ran off into his room to hang it up on the wall. Robin made a mental note to call Harvard and explain the details to them. Maybe they would keep the invite open for a while.

A hour had passed, and Sergeant Smoker hadn’t called in about how that damn kid of hers had beat up another adult. Robin settled down in the kitchen with her usual cup of tea and her laptop to continue writing out her recent visit to the ruins of the fallen Skypeia. Usopp ran past her from the garage, followed behind by the mister of the house drinking his seventh cola today. He placed a kiss on Robin’s forehead, and she could feel saliva bubbling from all the carbonation flowing through his system.

“So, got to the best part?” Franky asked as he sat down in his favorite chair, the first thing he built when the two bought the house.

“It’s not organized chronologically.” Robin shook her head with a smile. “The Tale of Wyper and the False God will be placed later in the book.” She could hear the TV and game system switch on from the living room. Sanji told Usopp to move over and he wanted the first controller, the black one.

“But you could still write it.” Franky motioned with his hands and cola bottle as he spun out the chapter dramatically. “Armed with his ancient weapon, forged through hours of toiling, Wyper walked forward without a single ounce of fear in his soul and stood before the altar built by slavery and pointed his bazooka towards the false god, nonchalantly eating a apple…”

As the race between Sanji and Usopp continued, Nami strode forth into the kitchen, carrying a large ledge with her. Sanji once more gave a large hello to his favorite sibling, but Nami undauntedly preceded forward towards her parents and held out the ledger. The title of the tank book read: “A Sister: It Might Cost You More, But Here’s Why It’s Worth It by Nami Mugiwara.”

“Mother, Father.” She started her salespitch. “These brothers are too loud and disgusting!” She opened up the ledger to a page with different figures all laid out. “So I would lie to present the new yearly financial plan for the addition of one sister, please. ASAP.” The look on her face outright stated she was completely serious about this affair.

“WHAT SHE SAID!” Sanji yelled from the couch in the living room, turning around to do his usual ‘Ero-Cook’ pose, as dubbed by Zoro. Usopp took advantage of the distraction to slam Sanji’s character with a green turtle shell and claim a ten second lead. Sanji didn’t seem to notice.

“Oh dear.” Franky started to chuckle as he opened the fridge and quickly snatched the nearest cola for his eighth cola. “Nami, this is a SUPER report and all…but…we already had six babies. A seventh one would consume room as well…and what if the baby becomes another boy?” He flashed one of his usual smiles. “It’s not like genetics are like machine parts that be rotated to fit any purpose. And yes, I know about generic engineering, but we have a better chance of paying Chopper’s entrance into college.”

“But the ledger.” Nami protested, waving the ledger around. “And the numbers…”

“Nice try.” Robin put a hand into Nami’s head and started to ruffle around her hair. “But you always got your friends.”

“You won’t let me see them.” Nami muttered.

“Dear, Perona and Porche are new, and they have gotten into trouble before. Give them time to get adjusted and you can see as often you want.” Robin stated. Nami huffed, tucked the ledger under her arm and walked off to her room stomping. Franky finished off his cola and got into his next one.

“I think we could get a seventh baby if we didn’t spend so much on cola.” Robin remarked with her usual calm demeanor and smile.

“We get the good stuff in bulk and for cheap.” Franky said after chugging down the bottle. “Besides, it keeps me energized and working.”

“You would get the same buzz if you would get up at normal hours, eat healthier foods, and exercise.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Franky ignored her as he got his ninth bottle.

Robin sighed and decided it was time to get laundry done. She needed to go over her notes anyway back in her office. As she passed by Nami’s room, she opted to not peek through the gap and instead spoke out loud: “Nami, dear.” The sound of a window opening from inside Nami’s room came to a sudden halt. “You’re grounded for that.” A ‘eep’ came from the second lady in the house. “An extra month if you leave anyway.” She continued down the hall with her laundry basket. As she could hear the door creak open and Nami slowly return to the living room, Robin reached around to the back of her neck and faked pushing something in. Nami saw that and let out a small scream as she ran down the hall.

One of these days, Robin would just safely glue on a eyeball to really spook Nami.

The house went quiet, surprisingly. Luffy returned in the hands of the more nicer Officer Tashigi, who bowed to both Franky (Carrying his fifteen cola) and Robin, saying that their son just took down a robber. Luffy had already finished off the meat he packed so he went into the kitchen to nab a quick snack. As he tried to reach for the cookie jar, he could hear a conservation going on behind in the living room.

“I need a new swimsuit for Keimi’s party…” Nami commented as she read through her fashion magazine while lying down on the couch. Seeing how one of the conditions of her grounding was the temporary cancelling of her magazine subscriptions, so she needed to make it last.

“I can help.” Sanji smiled as he crawled up Nami. She kicked him with both feet; while it pushed him away it didn’t stop him.

“Unless you can get a permit for cheap, we can’t use your cooking skills without getting into trouble.” Nami brought up.

“Ah!” Sanji raised a finger. “Lemonade stands don’t require permits, and I can make lemonade that will make people fly!”

“I thought you hated making simple and sugary snacks.” Nami brought up, actually putting down her mag.

“I will shave my head and dance in the street naked for you.” Sanji got up and bowed.

“Do neither.” Nami sat up straight. “But, if we sold each cup around a thousand berries, I could afford that swimsuit and other stuff…” She started to snigger. “Hey…Luffy?” She turned around to face her brother, currently stuffed with cookies. “Could you make us…a cardboard robot?”

“Yosh!” Luffy shouted between the huge mound of mashed-up cookies. “Yesh! Ussoopp!” He went down the hall with the still stolen cookie jar in his hands. Franky easily swiped the jar away as he entered the living room, but as he walked into the kitchen to put the jar back he noticed something.  Being one of the taller people in the house, it was hard to ignore really.

“Zoro?” He turned to face his green-haired son as he was planning on leaving to go down to the dojo and practice swords with other kids.  Franky pointed a finger upwards. “Have you been using the doorframe for pull-ups again?” This stopped the first eldest son dead in his tracks. “Zoro, I built you a great exercise rig. Why don’t ya use it?”

“Well…” Zoro turned around, all for a brief second before bolting out of the door with his bag. Franky just sighed as he went to get his twenty-third cola to consider the best way to fix the doorframe. Maybe it was time to fully convert the wooden finishing in the house into metal…

Night time came, and Sanji had managed to sneak around both his parent’s backs to once set up a small party. He made it a habit to play all sorts of music in his room at night to create a routine and help cover the party-goers activities. Only Nami attended; the younger sons didn’t care or weren’t invited, and Zoro could give a rat’s ass. Tonight had going good for Sanji. Conis, that angel that sat next to him in Algebra II and Home Ec. had developed a interest in him and wanted to spend some time in ‘heaven.’ Holding her hand and keeping his cool, he went to his closet…

“Yohoho!”

Oh no. Sanji groaned both out loud and in his head.

“You kids sure throw a good secret party!” Brook shouted, just to make the whole embarrassing event as announced as possible. “Want some different music! I found my old violin…”

“Gramps, get the hell out of the closet.” Sanji demanded. “And how the hell did you get in there anyway? I cleaned it out before the party got started!”

“Fell through the attic floor, you know, the usual adventures that a plucky young scamp like me gets into.” Brook opened the door and danced a little jig on his way downstairs. While Sanji didn’t fear Brook revealing the party to the actual adults of the house, he did fear that because his party goers would go back to school with rumors that would most likely embarrass him to each corner of the world.

But Conis giggled, kissed him on the cheek, and drew into the now vacant closet and everything was all right with the world.

Brook descended down the stairs, listening to the other people in the house. Luffy and Zoro snored while Robin quietly breathed. But as light as she sounded in bed, Robin would awaken immediately and beat her step-father senseless. But he could some old-time song coming from down-stairs and he followed it. Franky mindlessly patrolled the kitchen with his forty bottle of cola. Ignoring that, Brook turned towards the living room to see Usopp and Chopper watching a movie, being illuminated by the glow of the TV.

“Yohoho!” Brook announced himself to the delight of his grandkids and the annoyance of his son. “Oh, Pinnocchio! I remember when this film was in the theaters! I remember annoying the hell out of my parents to get me see the film every single day!” He plopped down onto the far end of the couch and got himself relaxed. Chopper laid his head down into his grandfather’s lap and Brook placed a hand on top of Usopp’s hand and patted his grandson’s head as they got to Usopp’s favorite scene…

The Blue Fairy explained to the caged Pinnocchio: “A lie keeps growing and growing, Pinnocchio, until it’s as plain as the nose on your face.”

But Franky didn’t hear the part. He hiccupped as the intense carbonation in his system bubbled over and made him a bit sick to the stomach. Sure, cola kept him and his business going and it got him this far…but will the eventual crash drag him and his family way past the starting point? He sat down and finished his bottle before gently settling it down on the table.

Recalling something from this morning, he dug into the trashcan and found the newspaper. He flipped to the ads and quickly scanned them. Thankfully, the ad he needed was still there and there was still time. He put on his old army engineer jacket, left a note on the fridge and went off into the lonely night. It took him six minutes to arrive at the community center and a extra two to get to the right floor and right room.

He stood in front of the door with the sign that read ‘Cola-holics Anonymous’. Sure, given his huge body build, bright blue hair that just shouted ‘expression’ and his pointed chin, he really wouldn’t be anonymous. But that was a petty concern now. Franky rested on hand on the knob.

“It’s for the kids…” He sighed as he went inside.

The day ended a bit differently than most days in the Mugiwara household, but still a normal day all things considered.